
Reflections
Jan 14, 2025
I always hoped to capture my grandkids’ lives on canvas as they were lived. It was easy to find moments when they were little, but I as they grew, I worried that so too would their reticence to be willing victims.
Apparently, my fears were unfounded.
* * *
My eldest grandson’s texts are brief and to the point. A representative selection:
- Send pic of you for profile on contacts
- Hi
- Spider-Man PS5 controller that is $80 or less
- R u picking me up
The demise of punctuation at the hands of instant messaging.
Then one day I noticed something different, his own profile pic showed up in all its glory. Here was an 11-year-old with an iPhone in full. I immediately knew that this is what I wanted to represent his mid-childhood years.
Growing up can be hard these days. Don’t get me wrong, there are many things to recommend it: access to technology, myriad entertainment options, parenting parents, the world at their fingertips. Also, not so great things such as: access to technology, myriad entertainment options, parenting parents, and the world at their fingertips. I often try to imagine my own childhood shoehorned into theirs but so many things just don’t fit. It’s hard for me to imagine what it would be like to be a child these days even as I witness it around me.
He is now 13 and has watched this painting unfold. I kept waiting for his disapproval, embarrassment, suggestions. But nothing surfaced. His sister pointed out that I’d missed a mark on his neck. There were no attempts to mask imperfections. The same cannot be said about me. My cosmetics drawer outs me. It’s full of hope, promises and disappointments.
Nostalgic lists of lost experiences pop up on fellow septuagenarians’ social media feeds. Running free from dawn to dusk, cap-guns, kick the can, Tinker Toys, 45 rpm records and Silly Putty, all bygone elements of childhood that have been replaced.
Was it all great? Nope. Definitely not. I have my list, I’m sure you do too.
So, I’m wondering. Is this boy, now 13 and stepping out of childhood towards adulthood, worse off or better? I used to think worse. But really, who am I to say? What wonder will be in his future that I could never conjure up? It’s easy to fear for the future. It is inherently unknown. Our experience and knowledge want to fill in the blanks but truly, we don’t know what it will bring. Even the greatest seers of old have been wrong.
* * *
He stands in front of a sunset reflected on the ocean and sky. In front of him, a building reflects onto his sunglasses. The waning light catches in his hair. He stands between worlds.
Painting: James on Block Island © Lissa Banks 2025
Edited 1/15/25